How to Get Rid of Your ANTs.

The article in the IDEA Fitness Journal goes on to make some suggestions to developing an internal ANTeater! (love that!)

First identify the ANT you hear and then talk back to them. Ask questions challenging them. Some of these questions were developed by Byron Katie, I have added a few.

• Is it true?
• Can I absolutely know it is true?
• Who would I be without that thought? Or how would I feel if I didn't have that thought?
• What can I do to change that thought?
• What thought could I replace it with that would be more productive?
• What are the benefits of having this thought?
• What are the benefits of changing this thought?

For example:

Here is a thought - "I have no control over my cravings"

Opposite thought - "I can control my cravings"

Take it further - "My cravings cannot control me and I will make this change to prove it"

Let me know what you think.

Help I have ANTs!

I found this article in the IDEA Fitness Journal. It reminds me of negative thinking published on 8/15/11 and contributing to another eating disorder published on 2/7/11, but it is another way of looking at common automatic negative thoughts or ANTs!

Therapists have identified 10 problematic ANTs:

1. All or Nothing - "I just ate a cookie I might as well eat the box!"
2. Always Thinking (overgeneralizing) - "I have always been fat, it will never change."
3. Focusing on the Negative - "I just lost 10 pounds but I want to lose 15, I am a failure!"
4. Thinking with your Feelings - "I feel like a loser I must be one."
5. Guilt Beating - "I ought to go the gym more."
6. Labeling - "I'm a slob"
7. Fortune Telling - "This might work for a while but it will never work in the long run."
8. Mind Reading - "Other people think I'm fat"
9. Blame - It's your fault I gained weight because you won't exercise with me"
10. Denial - " I only binge when I'm stressed out, not every day."

Do you have ANT's? What are you going to do to get rid of them? Some suggestions, next week...

Discipline Or What?

I was talking with a friend the other day and she was under the impression that I had a lot of discipline regarding food and exercise.

But upon further discussion we found that it was not so much discipline but how bad I wanted a certain outcome from my behavior.

So how much do you want to make the changes in your life that will make you happy? If you want them enough what are you willing to do to make them happen?

It is very simple, everyone can change, they just have to want to!

Great Green Recipe Ideas

As promised I have want to share some great green ideas to add to your diet.

Kale Chips -

1 bunch of kale coarsely chopped

1 Tablespoon Olive Oil sprinkled over Kale

1 Tablespoon Onion Flakes sprinkled over Kale

Sea Salt to taste

Roast prepared Kale in a dark pan at 400 degrees for 20 to 25 minutes until crunchy and brown.

When preparing soup chop up some swiss chard and swirl it in at the end. It will add a unique flavor to any vegetable or chicken based soup.

Look back to my blog on April 4, 2011 for an amazing smoothie recipe that adds greens that you don't even know you are drinking!

My breakfast is now a green drink. I usually just add water and lemon but this may take some getting used to. The benefits are so worth it. Some green drinks worth trying are: Barlean's or Orac-Energy Greens.

If you come up with other ways to add more green foods to your diet be sure to let me know.

Think Green When You Eat & Live

These are the words today...Think Green.

We are making more efficient cars, trying new ways to save energy and keep our world green and healthy. We should also be doing this for our bodies. Following the food guidelines are great and very important especially as we grow and change. Eat the proper amount of fruit, vegetables, protein, and carbohydrates.

But research has shown that adding more veggies and fruits to you diet helps people life longer and healthier. Among some of the benefits of a plant based diet is that plants contain chemicals termed phytonuitrients the retard aging, inhibit inflammation and prevent cancer. The indigestible fiber present in fruits and vegetables support healthy digestion as well. This same fiber also binds cholesterol as well as the body's toxic waste products for elimination from the body.

As a post menopause woman I have learned that we need more green. This is true for all women but especially as we enter pre-menopause, throughout menopause and post menopause. Estrogen dominance one of the key symptoms during the stages of menopause. Greens help us stay in hormonal balance by the natural cleansing of estrogen back up.

So consider adding more greens to your diets. I will help by publishing some great green recipes in future blogs.

Holiday Eating - How Do You Keep Control

How do you make Thanksgiving easy on yourself this year?

So many people eat so much food during this one day of the year they feel sick. Why, is what I want to know. When you can eat any of the foods you love best any time you want; what is it that makes Thanksgiving the time to overeat?

The Intuitive Eating Hunger Scale is a great tool to use during this day. On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being empty and 10 being overfull. Usually hunger begins when you are at a 2 on the hungerscale and fullness at a 7. It then takes about 3 to 4 hours to feel hunger again. Get out for a walk after dinner, do the dishes, dance around the house and you will be ready for more in no time at all.

So bottom line you can have that Thanksgiving dinner all over again, just make sure you save some leftovers!

Helping A Friend

I was walking the dog this morning and a woman was behind me most of the way talking on the phone. I have no idea who was on the other end of the phone or what this persons situation was like but I could hear one side of this conversation.

It gave me some thought for this week's blog. When you see a friend in need of some changes to improve their life, how do you approach it? Do you tell them what they should do? Do you tell them how to do it? What kind of language do you use when talking to them?

For example, the conversation I ease dropped on was this woman telling her friend that she should be exercising and stretching and them told her how to do all of this. I was taking offence just walking near her. The tone was authoritative, the message was clear I know better than you and you should be doing what I say.

People only change if they want to and will only make changes when they are ready. Telling someone how to lose weight, or how to start exercising is futile. Wellcoaching teaches us to ask the right questions and I would like to share some of those with you now so that you might help a friend in need in a better way.

For example you could say, What would you like to do to improve the quality of your life? What are some things that you can do now? What kind of help would you like to make these things happen. Start gentle and let people figure out their own way. Success if much more likely.

Groaning & Moaning

Every once in a while a client will moan when I give them a task. This past week my husband broke three ribs..ouch! He has been doing a lot of moaning.

What does a groan or a moan do for you? Does it make you feel better or worse? Does it help bring attention to you? Is this the intent?

I have been thinking since my husband's vocal moans this past weekend about what the moaning did for him. I asked him if it made him feel better but he could not answer me. I suggested he try to not concentrate on the pain by adding to it with a moan. I don't know if that worked but he did stop groaning and moaning so much!

I am going to start pointing out groans and moans to clients and see what they have to say. In the meantime, if you want attention by all means groan and moan. But it might add to the unpleasantness of the situation you are not happy about.

Just a thought!

Help Halloween Candy Invades My House

When Halloween comes around there is usually candy close by.

• A co-worker brings it in to work to get it out of their house!
• You have to buy enough for all the trick or treaters coming around.
• Your children bring home bags of candy from when they go out trick or treating.

Some where, some how candy is a plenty. If you are making an effort to cut back on sweets, if you have a tendency to binge on that gooey chocolate candy, if you have trouble resiting a piece here and there and everywhere, you are not alone.

So what can you do...make some goals for yourself.

1. Allow yourself and allotted amount without remorse. Preset the amount and stick to it!
2. Do the same for your children...the fun is in the gathering it doesn't have to be in the consuming!
3. Donate the remaining candy to a charity or children's shelter they probably don't have as much as you and your kids.
4. Plan ahead and buy candy you don't like! Doesn't account for what your kids bring home but go back to number 1 for that problem.

The important thing to remember is that Halloween is only one day and if you can get through that with goals and perseverance you only have Thanksgiving, Christmas, Hanukkah, the New Year, Valentines Day...to go!

New Top 10 for Longevity

I found this article in Fitness Magazine last month and had to share the new top 10 for longevity.

1. Snack on Watermelon - watermelon pack more cancer and heart disease fighting lycopene that tomatoes. Who knew!
2. Stalk Up on Asparagus - packing vitamin A and C, antioxidants, folate (a B vitamin) and glutathione (an amino acid).
3. A Daily Glass - Red Wine is best but all types of alcohol appear to have longevity benefits.
4. Be a Part Time Vegetarian - load up on fruits and vegetable it can be a recipe for long life.
5. Stay Slim - Most men and women that reach the age of 100 generally stay slim. Excess pounds lead to a slew of life threatening conditions.
6. Eat like an Okinawan - this is an area in Japan that has the people with the longest life spans on earth. They eat sweet potatoes and tofu as a staple of their diet.
7. Rethink Your Rice - There is an outer coating on brown rice that is removed to make white rice (something I did not know). Brown rice contains a wealth of age fighting micro- nutrients.
8. Pick Mushrooms - Mushrooms stimulated the immune system enough to ward off infections an tumors in preliminary animal studies. I am adding more to my soups and salads!
9. Cook at Home - People who live to 100 and beyond eat at home more than in restaurants throughout their lives and often enjoy cooking. Food cooked in a restaurant tends to be higher in fat and sugar and we often order things we would not eat at home.
10. Put the Brakes on Yo-Yo Dieting - Frequent fluctuations are hard on your heart and can raise your blood pressure. My personal advice pick a weight that you are comfortable in your own skin, head for it, make it achievable and stay there. (You may not be a 6!)

To read the full article for yourself go to:

http://fitnessmagazine.com/recpies/healthy-eating/superfoods/what-to-eat-to-live-longer

Don't Call It Exercise

Try thinking about exercise as an activity, something to do. Make it a priority to be more active throughout your day rather than having a pre-set exercise time and place.

Dance while you clean or straighten up your house. Walk farther in the parking lot when getting to work. Take a stroll around the office on your break. Listen to a book on tape or a DVD that you like when you take a walk.

Make it fun and active rather than exercise. Your will be moving and burning calories and not even feel it.

Are You Pregnant?

Did you ever ask anyone that question or have you been asked that question when you were NOT Pregnant?

Weight gain or loss can be a very personal experience. Sometimes it is directly related to pregnancy. Other times it can be illness, stress or dieting.

Watching your words when talking to people after noticing a significant weight gain or loss is extremely important. If someone has been ill making a comment about how great they look from losing weight may not be what they want to hear. Perhaps their change in weight was not their intentional. Just like asking someone if they are pregnant and finding out they are not, how embarrassing is that.

Try to keep your comments neutral... wow you look refreshed. Or if you do know someone has been working to make changes, say you look tone and fit.

Better still keep your comments to yourself and let the conversation flow in a happy positive way. Keep body comments out it.

Stand Up Straight

I was at a family reunion a few weeks ago and we all lined for a picture. As we were getting ready I noticed how we were standing, shoulders forward not actually slumping but not straight either.

It made me think about my own posture. Do I stand up with my shoulders back? How does it feel when I do?

The answer to this was simple, when I stood straight put my shoulders back I felt better and looked better. It was an amazing transformation. The key is to do it all the time.

Try it and see for yourself!

Are You at a Healthy Size....

12, 14, 16? This is a critical question.

I know many women that may not be small in their dress size but they are healthy and fit and take care of themselves. Unfortunately I know too many people that are larger but not in a healthy shape. This seems to be too much of our country today.

Not everyone is meant to be a size 2, 4, 6, 8, 10, but it is how you take care of yourself that counts. Do you exercise most days of the week? Do you most of the time eat healthy and choose food
wisely? Are you conscious of your portion sizes?

If this sounds like you and your clothes size is larger then this may be your natural body weight. For some this is hard to accept especially when we see magazine models and movie stars always so small.

The most important thing to remember is your health. Taking care to stay fit and strong, making good food choices is what every BODY needs, no matter what your size may turn out to be.

Don't Let Cold Weather Keep You In

Burrrr! In our area it seemed to get cold overnight. The weather took a turn and it may turn back but it got me to thinking about my winter walks with my high energy dog last year.

If you are a walker you may find it very hard to get outside as the weather gets colder. Many walkers hibernate for the winter. This is especially understandable if there is snow or ice on the ground. The thought of slipping can keep the most hearty of us inside.

The key to success is planning. My first suggestion would be to try a walk when the weather gets cold. The most important part of the cold weather walk is how you are dressed. Layer it up, get gloves/mittens and hats, scarves, wind breakers and put clothes on top of other clothes. As you get warmer you can undo or remove a layer for comfort.

I hate the cold weather but my crazy dog needed to get out last year and I learned how to walk in the cold weather. It was a great accomplishment for me and made my puppy very happy too.

Another part of planning for the cold weather exercise change is to make sure you have that back up plan in place, if you can't brave the cold. Dust off the treadmill, get to the library for some exercise tapes (or buy some), find some good music you can dance to. Whatever it will take to more around inside your warm house.

Excuses

We all have them, excuses not to do something. Procrastination, good valid reasons to put off something we know we should do. Instead of doing dreaded task we find other things to do first running out of time, finding "more important" tasks.

Since this is a health and wellness blog I will apply this writing to our health. We know, many times this pertains to exercising and we all do it. "I really need to stay at work and finish this project, I need to do this with my kids instead." Whatever it is we say to ourselves to get out of exercising.

What has been your excuse not to exercise as often as you should or at all! When are you going to stop making excuses and find the answers to a healthier life?

What will it take to stop making excuses to eating healthy? "I only had a few minutes so I drove through McDonald's...I did not have time to eat today and by the time I got home I was grabbing anything I could stuff in my mouth."

My answer to excuses is to work through them. What is the excuse and what can you do differently for a better outcome?

"I only had a few minutes so I drove through McDonald's. Answer: but I got a grilled chicken sandwich." A solution to a potential bad choice in a meal.

What different answers and better solutions can you come up with to make those excuses disappear?

Find Your Answers...To Exercise

This post is for my brother... we had a lovely dinner last night and I was doing what I love to do, asking questions to my sister-in-law to help her get the answers on where in her busy life she could find time to add strength training into her workouts.

As they were leaving she said "now do your brother".

Finding time to coach and ask my brother questions can be difficult. I decided to try to help him find answers by posting the questions. Perhaps this could help YOU find answers to making time for exercise in your day, as well.

Here are some questions pertaining to adding exercise to your day, what are your answers...

1. What is it you want to change?
2. What are you doing currently?
3. What is your schedule like?
4. How much time would you like to devote to exercise during your week? Realistically!
5. What days would you schedule those workouts?
6. What would you do during this time you allotted?
7. What day will you start with this new plan?
   

Make the goal specific, pick the time, the day, the exercise...write it on your calendar or put it on your schedule. Most importantly don't go from doing no exercise at all to making a goal of exercising 5 or 6 days a week. This is not a realistic goal, you will not fulfill your promise.

If you are doing nothing start with a 2 or 3 day a week goal. If you do 2 or 3 days add one more a few weeks and another after a couple more weeks. Make the habit first, start small and work to getting in more time.

I am very happy to help anyone by asking the right questions. If these questions are not giving you the answers you need give me a call.

Debbi, WholeLife Fitness - 908-238-1185

Find Your Personal Reasons To Exercise

Here are some strategies to use to help you make, find and maintain your personal reasons to exercise.

1. Setting realistic results and clear obtainable goals. Make one goal at a time.
2. Create the timing for exercise. If you can't find 30 minutes a few days a week then think about how your have organized your day. Perhaps you can find 3 - 10 minute periods to exercise.
3. Use inspiration, whether it is music, videos, articles, write in a journal or use a Fitness by Phone exercise diary, what ever it takes to get you moving.
4. Timing for exercise, what time of day works best for you, morning, afternoon, evening.
5. Cross train, do something different to move whenever you can, biking, walking, dancing.
6. Reward yourself for your successes.
   

Chew Slowly

During dinner the other day my husband announced that he read an article that said to chew each bite 40 times and that he worked on doing that at every meal he ate that day.

First of all I gave him an incredible look, like I have not been telling him to slow down when he eats for years! But he was amazed because he ate less at every meal and felt full and satisfied.

What is the message here, yes listen to your wife if she happens to have the education and knowledge.

But also this is very true that eating and chewing slowly will help you eat less and feel satisfied faster.

Get Rid of the Negative Voice

We all have one, the little voice in our heads that throws negative comments and thoughts our way.

This voice can come up when there is something in our schedule that is not appealing to do or when we our making a decision that is difficult. It can impact how we eat, whether we exercise or how we take care of ourselves.

How we deal with that voice can impact our lives daily and long term. Working through this negative voice and changing the tone is key to making better choices and decisions. This is true in health, work, family and general wellness.

What will you do this week or this day to change the tone of your negative voice?

What Happens To Your Workouts On Vacation?

This is a dilemma many of us have. We get a routine going, getting to the gym after work on regular nights, making time during our day for a walk, setting a schedule to workout weekly.

Then vacation comes along and the plans can sometimes go array. Our schedule is different, we feel different, getting up later in the day, relaxing with the family or friends. Sometimes it is harder to find the motivation to make the time for some formal type of exercise. This is all understandable.

If you workout hard 51 weeks out of the year and you want a week off then take it. There are studies that show an "active rest week" can regenerate your desire to exercise. The Fitness by Phone program actually suggests this as a way to prevent burn out and give the body and mind a rest.

But if you are the type of person that works out on a more sporadic basis, you may not want to take and entire week off from exercise. Perhaps you don't want to loose your momentum but it can still be difficult to make the time during vacation to exercise.

Making some specific plans before you leave for vacation can help. Plan a few days you can get up a little earlier, slip away after dinner any time you may find to add in a little exercise "me time". Make the goals ahead of time and you are more likely to keep them.

Another good idea, if you can manage it would be one or two days of simple strength training. A few push ups, some tricep dips, and some abs. This will keep whatever muscle conditioning you have accomplished before you trip in shape and prevent soreness when you start up exercising again.

Have a great vacation week whatever you decide to do for exercise or not!

Don't Eat It

I am writing this blog because I did it again.

Felt good with what I ate all day and wanted to treat myself that night. Standing in front of the pantry with nothing really appealing but still feeling the need to treat. Rummaging around found some candy. Made myself sit down to eat as I always preach. But I must admit it was not hitting the spot. It never really tasted that good...but I ate it anyway!

Why, I had it in my mind to find some sweet treat and it did not seem to matter how it tasted I was going to eat it. I will have to admit I even when back for more. Crazy I know, but I think we have all been there.

I went to bed wondering why I ate the sweet that tasted so unappetizing. I have no answer I just know I will think a little harder before doing that again! How about you?

TOO HOT TOO MOVE

This week, these words have been so true for most of us on the East Coast.

But...thank goodness for air conditioning. If you have it you are very fortunate so don't let it stop you from keeping so some kind of exercise routine.

If you don't have it go to the mall, put the blinders on, and walk. Coolness and exercise how can you beat that!

Just Do Something

Park a little farther away from the store, walk to visit a friend instead of drive do any thing you can to add a little more movement into your regular day. Extra calories burned is better feelings gained.

Add Weight to What You Do

My message today is simple to say but sometimes difficult to do. No matter how often you work out it is very important to add strength training to your routine.

Weight bearing exercises are especially important for women as it increases bone strength giving us extra wear on our aging bones. This will help to prevent and lessen the effect of osteoporosis. The same is true for men, bone strength is equally important as all of us age.

I have a couple of suggestions to add weights into your normal work out. If you usually do cardio for 30 minutes, one of those days make your cardio 10 minutes to warm up then add in the weights. Weighted workouts will burn fat through out the day, your muscles are warm and working better. If you add walking lunges, knees up, balance training you can even keep your heart rate up while do the strength training. Of course the best suggestion I can give is to add to 20 minute weighted workouts to your week.

The important thing is to do what you can but pick up those weights and get your muscles tight and your bones strong!

Enjoy & Celebrate the Independence of Our Country

Today we celebrate the freedom of our country.

How lucky we are, most of us have enough to eat and a place to live. If we do not have a home or enough food there are charities and good people to help us find our way. We have the freedom change our situation with help or on our own. Many people in other countries do not have our luxuries.

So today, enjoy your freedom, eat, drink, enjoy and have in mind your continued good health while you do.

Breakfast Egg Salad

I found this recipe in Everyday Food and had to share it. It combines all the foods I love and the right balance of fat, protein and carbohydrates and it is low in calories!

Breakfast Egg Salad

• 4 large eggs


• 1 teaspoon Dijon mustard


• 1 tablespoon fresh lemon juice


• 1/4 avocado, diced


• coarse salt and ground pepper


• 2 ounces sliced smoked salmon (2 slices)


• 1/3 cup watercress, thick ends trimmed


• 2 slices whole-grain bread

In a small pot, cover eggs with water by 1 inch and bring to boil over high heat. Cover, remove form heat and let sit 12 minutes. Transfer eggs to a colander and run cold water over them until cool enough to handle. Peel eggs and separate whites from yolks. Reserve 1 yolk. Coarsely chop egg whites.

In a medium bowl, whisk together mustard and lemon juice Finely grate egg yolk into mustard mixture and whisk to combine. Stir in egg whites and avocado and season with salt and pepper. To serve, divide smoked salmon, egg salad, and watercress between toasts. Serves 2. Enjoy!

per serving: 285 cal; 12g fat(3g sat. fat);28g protein; 17g carb; 4g fiber

Finish The Bite

How many times a day do we eat. Most of us at least three meals, not including snacking and picking. If you are like me you eat five or six small meals a day.

A thought came to my head the other day. I was especially hungry, something had deterred my regular meal time. You know that feeling when you need to eat and you will just about eat anything you can find. As I was stuffing food into my mouth, I realized I still had food in my mouth from my last bite!

Okay so this was an unusual situation for me, I was ravenous. So I decided to gauge my other meals and found I did it fairly often, put another bite into my mouth when I was not yet done with the other one.

So I decided to become more conscious of my eating and taking a bite. When I did wait, I discovered something pretty nice, I really enjoyed my food even more. I was appreciating the taste and texture. I slowed down, did not need as much food and had a better meal.

Something to be said for Finishing Your Bite...

How Do You Want To Live Your Life?

I had this conversation with my son the other day. There were so many people worried that the world was going to end on May 21 at 5:59 PM. This man's prediction made big news and many children and families chose to be effected by his words. Why I am not sure, to be afraid of living or dying is such a difficult way to live your life.

My thoughts tend to go to the here and now. I am alive, I want to live life to the fullest and enjoy all it has to offer. So, How Do You Want To Live Your Life? Worried, sad, unhappy, unsatisfied, uncomfortable, etc. OR happy, satisfied, complete, comfortable, etc.

For example, I was talking to a friend that was using food as a comfort, consoling herself when she was lonely or unhappy. When she did this it tended to backfire because then she would feel unhappy with the food choices made or the overeating that ensued.

I asked...how do you want to live you life? What changes or choices can you be making to live it differently?

We all have choices and decisions we make everyday. Start with the small changes that are easy to control...shut the door of the pantry or fridge when you are not really hungry. Make a choice to start a journal or a log, or a bath, if that works for you, or find what will work
for you.

Why Diets Don't Work - Part 2

We often swing from one diet to another...hoping, searching for the one diet the works. We will loose the weight and most importantly maintain our weight loss.

What has been your esperiences with diets? Most of my clients and friends have found diets that work. The milk diet, the grapefruit diet, no carb diets, cut the fats diets...they all tell you to give up the foods you enjoy. However, in the long run the result is the same, binge-ing on the foods not allowed. Then after you stop following the program the weight comes back.

Why? Because if you deprive yourself of food it becomes that much more attractive. The forbidden fruit. Telling your teenager they are not allowed to date someone you don't approve of only makes that forbidden someone more desirable.

So what can you do? Well regarding your teenage my advise based on my experience with my own teen, is to have supervised visits. This way you have some control, but in reality good luck with that. As for diets and food, now my expertise kicks in...EAT! I know I have said this before but it needs to be said again...EAT!

This may take some getting used to, taking foods off your "no, no" or "bad" food list. To start with you may find yourself overeating on foods not so healthy just because it has been so long since you allowed yourself to just eat without guilt.

Eventually, your brain and intuitive body health will kick in. If you stop before you eat to think about what would really taste good. Then turn off the mindless eating, eat, think, enjoy and react to your stomach and how it is feeling as you eat. Imagine how you want to feel after you eat.

It is very scary to give up dieting but it is possible to do and in the long run you will be free to eat and enjoy any food you like.

I am always available to help work through this process. Please contact me at any time.

Why Diets Don't Work - Part 1

Well if diets did work wouldn't everyone be skinning. Diets don't work because of something called "diet backlash binge-ing". Sound like a mouthful and in reality it can be a mouthful of food.

Diets have a list of good foods. Foods you are permitted to have on the particular diet plan. They also have a list of "bad foods". These are foods that are the "no, no's". In addition the "bad" food side of the list is always extensive while the "good" food side of the list is so very short.

Dieting people find themselves on a pendulum, staying on one particular diet for a while, getting tired of the food limitations...binge -ing on the very foods the diet prohibits. Eventually making a decision to find a different diet, but again this diet has a list of "good" foods to choose from and a list of foods you are not permitted to eat. Swinging back and forth from one diet to the next.

What kid of crazy way is this for us to live? Ask yourself what kinds of diets you have been on, how have they worked in the long run? What kinds of foods do you deprive yourself of eating and how has that worked for you? Check back next week, I have a crazy answer for you.

Women Pull The Wagon

Why do we as women always feel we have to fix everything? Make it all good, handle all the problems, make our children happy, our spouse/significant other satisfied, our bodies perfect. We carry the weight of the world. For some reason we as women feel the need to make everything all right.

A friend was telling me about a poem that talks about a young girl pulling a wagon with a few things she has on her mind to work on. In the poem as she gets older the wagon gets heavier and heavier as it loads up with problems and things she wants to fix. Finally she is an old woman and the wagon is so heavy with all the things she has accumulated over the years, she can hardly move it. At the end of the poem someone says to her as she is dragging and pulling this heavy wagon..."why don't you just drop the handle and stop pulling?"

I absolutely love this idea, what if we stopped trying to take on the world and fix everything. I know it won't be easy. To be honest, I am not sure how much I can personally do but even if we gave one issue away think of the load off!

More thoughts on "I Just Had Sex"...

Here's another thought what do we look and think about when we see our men?

Love handles, wrinkles, sagging jowls, fat thighs...not usually. Except for maybe a pot belly most of the women I have talked to see our men without the stigmas of physical imperfections. They think of their men as good husbands, hard workers, good providers, great dads.

The men I have spoken to, as I mentioned last week, usually focus on our capabilities as women more so then our minute body parts. Our functions as moms, providers, care takers and of course the ability to satisfy their physical needs.

Time to change our thinking women...we are beautiful to our men as we are. We don't focus on their physical imperfections, they don't focus on ours. Ask yourself...

What would it feel like to stop fixating on our physical bodies and appreciate ourselves?

"I Just Had Sex"...did I get your attention

Last week, my daughter showed me a video of a guy singing this song titled "I Just Had Sex". Although the video wasn't explicit the words were more so. Basically the artist was singing about how happy he was that this woman allowed him to have sex with her. This got me thinking...

When women look at our bodies we are very critical, what I don't like here, what needs to be tucked in here, my fat....whatever?

When men look at us for the most part they are appreciative of our pretty face, our nice smile, our shapely figure but what they really want and think about is having sex. I would like to clarify that I said "for the most part". This may not be true for men in the 20's or powerful, successful men, their thoughts may lean toward the more material, using women as objects.

For the most part, men don't really focus on our fat body parts or anything else we don't like about ourselves. Why do we then focus on our defects? Our men simply want to be with us and if we allow ourselves to enjoy that and throw out our critical selves we will be much happier.

More thoughts on this to follow...

Be Consistent For Success

Do Your Clothes Fit From Last Season? This is sometimes the greatest seasonal challenge. Over the winter we are less active. Sometime you put on weight. Other times it is just the months going by and the pounds creeping up.

What a chore it can be to take some clothes out of your closet for the next season or year and have them too tight. Nothing sucks worse than that.

Like exercise consistency with eating is an answer that may help keep weight changes in check. Making a schedule to exercise each week. Look at your week ahead and plan what days you can move. Whether it is going to the gym, taking a walk or dancing around the house. Do it when you have it on your schedule.

Sticking to basically the same foods and eating times each day will help keep weight in check too. Make up menu ideas a week in advance. Take your food to work, plan snacks and treats throughout the day. Even picking 5 or 6 days a week and eating basically the same food thus getting the same calories.

Being consistent with your exercise and eating habits will keep those clothes fitting year after year.

Get Outside

What kind of energy do you have?

When you get home from work what do you do?

What do you feel like when you get up in the morning?

Would you like to have more energy?

What would that feel like?

If your answers were negative; no energy, tired all the time, not looking forward to the day...anything along these lines...I say try getting outside. Even if you have to lounge in a chair and take a 10 minute nap. The sun, wind and weather will refresh you. It is spring and it is time to spring into action. Take a 10 minute walk, pick weeds for 10 minutes the actions will revive you. 10 minutes could lead to 20 minutes, you will have more energy and feel better.

Give yourself 10 minutes outside in the beautiful weather and get better answers!

9 Tips for Longevity

These tips are based on the habits of blue zone populations, as published in the IDEA Fitness Journal in February 2011.

1. Make regular activity intrinsic to your daily routines
2. Have a "Plan de Vida" i.e. a mission or purpose that give meaning to your life.
3. Take your life out of the fast lane: work less, slow down, rest, take vacations.
4. Eat less by following the "80% rule" (stop eating when you're 80% full).
5. Shift your diet to more vegetables and fruits, less protein and fewer processed foods.
6. Drink red wine in moderation.
7. Create a healthy social network.
8. Cultivate spiritual and religious beliefs and participation.
9. Make family a priority.

The researcher Buettner said in the article "We see from the blue zones and aging research in general that these behaviors are associated with longer life - and the same things that can help you to a healthy 90 or 100 can get you there better. They don't just add years; they're vital, enriching years.

The Perception of Ourselves

I was talking to a friend recently and she had an epiphany. She realized her beautiful slim 15 year old daughter was the same weight she was when she got married and several times in the past. Okay, not so much yet but... she always viewed herself as fat at that weight! Can you imagine what that says about her perception of herself?

I talk to women all the time that view themselves as "fat". I am guilty of it myself, I view my fat parts and feel unhappy with them as well. But, I have come to realize I am the only one viewing those parts as fat. This is true of the women that tell me they are fat or flabby too. It is our own distorted perception of our bodies.

My message here is let's try to ease up on our criticisms about ourselves. We are definitely more beautiful and slimmer than we see with our own eyes!

Cool Healthy Smoothie

I can't resist sharing this wonderful recipe with you for the warm weather coming up. There are so many variations you can add to make it to your liking. The best part though is the added healthy greens that you don't taste but benefit in so many ways. I prefer to use organic ingredients being the crazy health nut that I am, but you certainly don't have too, the benefit is still there.

Cool Health Smoothie:

• 1 bunch of Purple Swiss Chard
• 1 frozen Banana (peel before freezing)
  
• 3/4 cup Apple Juice
• 1 cup frozen blackberries
• 1 TBS vanilla (soy or regular) protein powder
• 1 TBS Barlean's Greens Powder
• 1TBS ground flax seed

Start with the Swiss Chard in food processor until pasty. Add the rest of the ingredients and enjoy. If too thick add a little water or more juice.

For variety add yogurt, soy milk, different fruits or liquids.

Happy Spring.

Don't Swallow!

I have just a short little tip that I have been using for many years.

When I put something I think I want to eat in my mouth and it does not taste as good as I thought it would....I SPIT IT OUT!

Yep, why eat it add the calories to my day and not enjoy every bite I take!

Spring Fever

Okay, so it is spring technically but the weather here has not begun to cooperate. Regardless I still find myself with a touch of Spring Fever.

Typically people are ready for a change during the spring. Many start walking outside, making new plans to exercise and change eating habits. What a great way to start new, like the new flower blooming and budding even though it is 30 degrees in the morning!

So what will you do a new this spring?

Whatever it is make sure your goals are written down, is there an app for that? Writing down your goals can make them more real. Write obtainable goals for each change you want to make.

Consider 3 month goals. then weekly goals and even daily goals. Break it down day by day based on your schedule. Most importantly... Write them down.

Enjoy the changes or not that you want to make this spring. I know the weather will get warm eventually.

Write It Down...Plan It Out

How many days go buy and you feel unsatisfied with the food you consumed that day?
What happens on those days that creates the environment where you eat mindlessly?
How do you feel at the end of those days?

I recommend a few solutions to having a better idea of what you are eating and why you are eating it.

The first one is on the top of the list and the most dreaded...write it down. Purchase a small note book that you can carry and keep for your eyes only. Then every bit of food that goes into your mouth put it in the book.

Also in that book add a column for how you feel when you are eating.
A =anxious, M = mad, AN = annoyed, T = tired, B= bothered, you get the idea.

Then after a few weeks of keeping track of your mood and your food see if there is a pattern. What can you do to change that pattern? Pack snacks? Plan ahead for your meals? Remove yourself from the situation that caused the moody eating? Think about what you can change to have a better feeling and outcome at the end of the day.

Mindfulness - What Is It and What Can It Do For Me.

Mindfulness is referred to paying attention to the present moment. Having a profound respect for the present moment.

Behaviors can't be changed without being present, being aware of the moment. With increased awareness you are more likely to make better decisions.

For example: Have you ever sat down with a bag of chips in front of the TV, only to look down and realize you have finished the entire bag. This is mindless eating, you were not paying attention to the moment.

Coming home from a hard day at work and feeling tired and hungry. Sitting with the kids doing homework after school any stressful situation that may prompt you to dive into a bag of chips or eat unconscious.

My suggestion: Become aware of the moment: Sit in your car for a few minutes do the physical act of rubbing your stomach. What are you thinking about? What are you feeling? Is it hunger or some other type of need? Sitting with your children, do a physical act to increase your body's awareness.

This will help put you in the present and may help make more mindful decisions.

New Heart Rate Recommendations for Women

This was stated in the January IDEA Fitness Journal:

According to researchers, the popular formula of 220-Age= HR max may produce numbers too high for optimal female physical health. After studying how HR response to exercise stress testing was associated with age and death rates among 5,437 asymptomatic women over about 16 years, scientists settled on a new calculation:
206-(Age x 0.88) = HR max

So where did the original formula come from? "The definition of normal HR response to exercise stress testing in women is poorly understood, given that most studies describing a normative response were predominately based on male data".

So if you are a woman of 50 years old your HR max would be 162. This is definitely something to think about.

Look Back on Your Past Diets

I was talking to a woman the other day and she made a comment "My husband and I have to go back on the South Beach Diet".

For a moment look at this statement and how it sounds..."have to go back". Why should you have to return to something that did not maintain your desired weight? If it did not stick the first time why should it stick the second time? I realize that a diet may work initially. You are restricting your calories and eating specific foods and making sure your portions are correct. The biggest problem is that when you go back to eating the way you did before you picked that diet over time you will gradually gain the weight back.

Instead I would like to suggest a life style change that is lasting. Don't pick a diet that restricts, pick food that you like and enjoy eating and learn how to manage it. Make portions that are healthy and satisfying.

Intuitive Eating can help you learn how to do this. Please give me a call if you would like to learn more. Stop dieting and start enjoying food.

Stretching

When it comes to improving flexibility there is nothing better than stretching. Range of motion is also greatly improved.

If you are anything like me it is sometimes it is very difficult to take the time to stretch. When I am done exercising I want to be done exercising.

So this is my rule of thumb...15 second stretches are the best but 5 second stretches are better than nothing. Also, when I do give myself the time to take those 5 second stretches they end up feeling so good I usually end up holding that wonderful feeling for longer!

Didn't Do It Today...Do It Tomorrow

The lesson, "if you did not get to it today, do it tomorrow" can apply to many things including exercise, eating and writing your weekly blog.

I made a commitment to myself to write this blog every Monday. Even if it had to be one line of thought or comment or advise.

So here it is Tuesday. Yep, I am late. Life got in my way. I got a last minute notice, yesterday, Monday, that my dad was in the hospital. No time to write my blog.

But out of missing my personal deadline, came my blog for this week. If you miss your intended day of exercise, if you find yourself at the end of the day not happy with your food choices, if you had the intention to go to the gym but had to work late...
whatever life throws you... make up your goal the next day.

It will get done and it will still feel great!

Next 10 - How I Might Be Contributing to Another's Eating Disorder

11. Say something that presumes that a fat person wants to lose weight.

12. Say something that presumes that fat people should lose weight.

13. Say something that presumes that fat people eat too much.

14. Refer to "good" and "bad" food.

15. Talk about "being good" and "being bad" in reference to eating behavior.

16. Admire appearances.

17. Admire slenderness.

18. Make weight important.

19. Encourage perfectionism.

20. Admire excessive exercise.

How I might be Contributing to Another's Eating Disorder Top 10..

1. Encouraging someone to pursue slenderness/dieting or deprivation of "fattening" food.
2. Tease someone about their eating habits.
3. Criticizing someone eating habits or choices.
4. Admiring weight loss diets or weight loss dieting.
5. Admire rigidly controlled eating.
   
6. Criticize your own eating habits or choices.
7. Make negative comments about your body or some other persons fatness.
8. Support the assumption that no one should be fat.
9. Disapprove of fatness in general.
10. Say or assume someone is doing well because of weight loss.

Next week continued with next 10!

More Exercise Readiness

Last week you identified your top 5 Values and added specific identifiers to them. This week I would like you to bring at least one of those values to the benefits of exercise. Even if none of your values mention exercise in them there is a way to relate them.

For example:
If one value is your family ask yourself what will adding exercise into your life do for your family? Make you a happier person if you are fit? Make you more comfortable in your life if you have good health? Spend more quality time with your family? Asking some questions can help you identify how the benefit of exercise relate to your values.

Then set an objective milestone.

An objective milestone is something you would like to achieve that in a certain period of time.For example:
As a family we will add one active activity into our week on a regular basis in 6 mos.

The next task is to make a Related Value Statement. This brings you back to your value as it relates to you. For example continuing on the same value of family:

I will be active and happy with my family.

Try this it is really fun and can bring you around to making exercise a regular part of your values. See what happens and how you feel when you do this activity.

Exercise Readiness Continued

Last week I asked you to list your top 5 values. This week I would like you to customize them by making specific statements about each value.

Here is an example of one of my values relating to fitness and health:

"I am a vibrant and physically active person."

Specific Identifier - My children are 19 and 16 years old. It is my desire to live an active life and to maintain my health so that I will be around to see my children when they, graduate from school, get married and have children.

Now it is your turn. Get specific and identify your values and motivators.

Ready to Exercise Part 2

Identifying whether you are ready to exercise can be a challenge. You may think you are ready and then the intentions fizzle out.

There are some things you can do to help determine if you are ready.
Start out answering the questions, What is a commitment? What is a Value? What is a Goal?

Then list your values from 1 to 10. Then pick you top 5 and and number them in order of importance. Is exercise, fitness, health any of those top 5? If so you can use this to create goals of fitness. All is not lost if they are not part of your top 5 you just have more work to do.

Start this week by answering those questions and listing your values. We will take it from there. If you want to work more on this sooner give me a call.

Are You Ready To Exercise?

There are 5 phases of readiness to change:

1. Pre-contemplation
2. Contemplation
3. Preparation
4. Action
5. Maintenance

There are also 3 areas of self to consider:

1. Your emotional state
2. Your mental state
3. Your physical state

All of these things effect your readiness to start and continue exercising. The good news is that even if you are in the pre-contemplation stage you can get to action by evaluating your values.

I am here to help with that and would like to offer a free evaluation for anyone interested. Give me a call 908-238-1185 or email at spencellen@earthlink.net.

Get ready to change in 2011!